right now, currently in a sad mood i mean right now only... i'm sure the next day i'll be great as always... (i guess??) i do not know why but my mood started to change right after i watch a movie... it happened many times already n i just do not get it why is it like this..... is not just a sad movies that cause me bad mood but even after a thriller movies, romantic movies, comedy movies and many many dunno what kind of movies.......... can also made me getting this mood n plus..... i don like this mood from the moment....... i was born.... (yesh.... i can tell that nobody likes it) when such things like this occurs to me, i will start to think about the past and the future.... trust me..... believe me...... my brain will only think about the bad stuff and the sad sad sad stuff that had happen to me. sometimes i wanted to kill myself for thinking so negatively all the times.... but i couldn't help it because this things is already a part of my life and i couldn't take it out..... before i wrote this blog.... i was currently watching "the nanny's diaries" i mean is "the nanny's diaries"...... "the nanny's diaries only!!!!" the emotional thingy started right after i finish watching it... i mean come on lar...... nothing special bout that movies... it was just talking bout the nanny n the boy bla bla bla bla bla...... but it just pop up in my mind.... i'm really tired of this..... once i feel this moody moody stuff.... i would start thinking regretful things, sad things, angry things n i just continue thinking about it.. i can't ignore it unless i take sleeping pills....... n of course if my dad knows i took sleeping pills..... i would be dead.... the reason i'm writing this blog now at 1.34am is to get rid of my mooddddiiiiiiness..... n den i can get a good, well and healthy sleep... (kononnya healthy sleep... wat time di lar...) n this is kind of the only way..... to get rid of my moody moody.... n so... right now feeling kind of tired.... better get to sleep before my dad knows that i'm still playing the computer.....
luv,
june
june